My most favorite thing to do is see fellow organizers posting updates such as... did you know making the most of your time can help decrease stress?
Well of course you do! Sometimes we have a way of stating the obvious! When we should just get down to the basic principle that we all have more stuff now, and less room in most cases to keep it in and no time to figure out what to do with it. Life happens and sometimes we are dealt set backs. It is during these set backs or moments when life is calling on our full attention that we get backlogged. Some of us it takes one room, some it takes a whole house to realize it. Of course you know if you made better use of your time, you would have less stress.
Please excuse me, it is a little gripe I have that I see often...but I know you are smarter than that!
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Lula's going to be on the radio next Tuesday!!
Tune in Tuesday at 2pm to hear Lula talk about decorating for fall on a budget and organizing for the new season!
http://www.wixi1360.com/program_schedule.cfm
http://www.wixi1360.com/program_schedule.cfm
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Some things Betty Jean sent home with me!
The enclosed notecard reads: "Greetings Mark, A nasty spider bite had me laid up a day - I'm fine today - I finally painted the bathroom and did some much needed spring cleaning - gave the Salvation Army another haul of stuff. Tomorrow I begin looking for a job- ugh! Too windy for gardening. I'm unwinding with my cat in my lap and classical music. Thanks as always for the great mail, how do you find the time?" Love, Kathy 1981
Enjoy Now!
Labor Day weekend we went on a little family trip 3 hours south to see my folks and then another 2hr drive to spend the day at the beach.
Saturday the whole family was to come and spend the day. I come from a family whose siblings are widely set apart and so various stages of our lives have always overlapped. Like my middle sister just sent her son to college and is now an empty nester, my niece just had a baby 6 months ago so there is a little new person in our family. From 25-75 we have a stage to fit everyone! That being said...I sometimes break the norm because I'm not ready for the next stage. We are getting into the dreaded questions "So...when are you getting your tubes tied."
As we have made it through our recent set of challenges, kept our faith and stayed pretty steady-on course we felt it time to sit back on the beach Sunday and reflect on where we were in life.
There is this recurring theme…from friends, family, from each other…are we done having kids? Two is safe, so what will you do? Push it or hold what you have!
Folks thinking we just got the youngest in kindergarten, surely we wouldn't be crazy? That’s like starting over!! My family gasps when we hesistate to answer.
Watching the other children on the beach, and our children playing with other children we realized we kinda have it made, but wouldn’t it be nice to try one more? Didn’t really matter boy or girl, just one more.
They both grew up so fast. And we know when we have a baby there is that short period of time where time stands still.
Did I feel the need to put more on myself. Hadn’t I JUST come through a storm? My recent scare with June’s surgery, my Lula’s lawsuit (dismissed last week, peace!), my loss of a major mentor, along with my baby starting kindergarten really shook me and I held on so tightly to prevent a crack in my emotional foundation. But it was all fine. I had to turn it over to Him and get use to NOT working it all out in MY time but it was fine. Both issues took a little longer than my liking, but hey...can't rush God, huh?
We have indeed realized how fast our time has gone by, Bayne and I both agreed we desperately desire to hit the reset button.
I Started Gretchen’s Rubin’s book “The Happiness Project” in January with my women’s circle. It didn’t make it with the group past the 2nd month but I’ve continued it on my own. While I am happy, I have always wondered could I be happier? Have I gone through all I’ve gone through, lots of self reflection and awareness to be bitter about dirty dishes. I feel differently about my station in life than I did before we had Baylor. I am in a unique position to slow down, focus on my real pleasures and work on writing a little more. I would love to have the opportunity to be pregnant, give birth and enjoy the months following without having to work through my pregnancy and get permission to enjoy maternity leave. I would love to do it stress free!!
We are in a new home, with “2” bathrooms, and a great set up for a nursery. Bayne is already having to go out of town more and we are use to that again and we are already adjusted to one income.
I remember hearing “you tell me why and I’ll tell you why not” growing up as a kid . I have a weird feeling my Dad said it frequently, especially during my teenage years. I feel like I know the “whys” but the “why nots” seem to be rooted out of fear and I have a new motto not to let fear rule me! Much like riding a horse, I have decided if it something I hesitate at I first have to understand WHY I hesitated to move forward. Fear, fear is why. So, ultimately to overcome your obstacle and move forward, proud in your achievements, one must face that fear head on.
I also realize I must risk failure. We had no participants in our 3rd session of Financial Peace University at our local church. So it didn’t appeal to anyone right now, okay maybe it will in the Spring. We needed the break anyway. But we did help two groups collectively pay off over $60,000 in 26 weeks so we should celebrate that.
I feel my path is guided by God anyway and so I trust completely. Its kinda of like that when I’m writing my blogs. I compile several trains of thought throughout the week and then go back and link them all together. Basically working on an outline all week then filling it in all in one sitting. That way it is current, but I feel it leaves me little time to critique myself. The good thing about doing it this way is I find I don’t go back and edit myself over and over. If I were to truly let my brain loose with that task I might never hit publish on a single one. I have learned that one has to experience criticism to grow and without the failures there could be no successes!
So, with that being said I think we have resigned ourselves to take more risks, embrace the possibility of failure but more importantly to enjoy the now . And whenever we decide we want to do something different it is hard to find someone who can give us a valid “why not“! With that mentality we will see where we go from here. Between now and next Thursday I will have had my 3 month follow up mammogram. I am nervous of course but trust it will be fine whatever happens. Today I am “Enjoying my NOW!”
Saturday the whole family was to come and spend the day. I come from a family whose siblings are widely set apart and so various stages of our lives have always overlapped. Like my middle sister just sent her son to college and is now an empty nester, my niece just had a baby 6 months ago so there is a little new person in our family. From 25-75 we have a stage to fit everyone! That being said...I sometimes break the norm because I'm not ready for the next stage. We are getting into the dreaded questions "So...when are you getting your tubes tied."
As we have made it through our recent set of challenges, kept our faith and stayed pretty steady-on course we felt it time to sit back on the beach Sunday and reflect on where we were in life.
There is this recurring theme…from friends, family, from each other…are we done having kids? Two is safe, so what will you do? Push it or hold what you have!
Folks thinking we just got the youngest in kindergarten, surely we wouldn't be crazy? That’s like starting over!! My family gasps when we hesistate to answer.
Watching the other children on the beach, and our children playing with other children we realized we kinda have it made, but wouldn’t it be nice to try one more? Didn’t really matter boy or girl, just one more.
They both grew up so fast. And we know when we have a baby there is that short period of time where time stands still.
Did I feel the need to put more on myself. Hadn’t I JUST come through a storm? My recent scare with June’s surgery, my Lula’s lawsuit (dismissed last week, peace!), my loss of a major mentor, along with my baby starting kindergarten really shook me and I held on so tightly to prevent a crack in my emotional foundation. But it was all fine. I had to turn it over to Him and get use to NOT working it all out in MY time but it was fine. Both issues took a little longer than my liking, but hey...can't rush God, huh?
We have indeed realized how fast our time has gone by, Bayne and I both agreed we desperately desire to hit the reset button.
I Started Gretchen’s Rubin’s book “The Happiness Project” in January with my women’s circle. It didn’t make it with the group past the 2nd month but I’ve continued it on my own. While I am happy, I have always wondered could I be happier? Have I gone through all I’ve gone through, lots of self reflection and awareness to be bitter about dirty dishes. I feel differently about my station in life than I did before we had Baylor. I am in a unique position to slow down, focus on my real pleasures and work on writing a little more. I would love to have the opportunity to be pregnant, give birth and enjoy the months following without having to work through my pregnancy and get permission to enjoy maternity leave. I would love to do it stress free!!
We are in a new home, with “2” bathrooms, and a great set up for a nursery. Bayne is already having to go out of town more and we are use to that again and we are already adjusted to one income.
I remember hearing “you tell me why and I’ll tell you why not” growing up as a kid . I have a weird feeling my Dad said it frequently, especially during my teenage years. I feel like I know the “whys” but the “why nots” seem to be rooted out of fear and I have a new motto not to let fear rule me! Much like riding a horse, I have decided if it something I hesitate at I first have to understand WHY I hesitated to move forward. Fear, fear is why. So, ultimately to overcome your obstacle and move forward, proud in your achievements, one must face that fear head on.
I also realize I must risk failure. We had no participants in our 3rd session of Financial Peace University at our local church. So it didn’t appeal to anyone right now, okay maybe it will in the Spring. We needed the break anyway. But we did help two groups collectively pay off over $60,000 in 26 weeks so we should celebrate that.
I feel my path is guided by God anyway and so I trust completely. Its kinda of like that when I’m writing my blogs. I compile several trains of thought throughout the week and then go back and link them all together. Basically working on an outline all week then filling it in all in one sitting. That way it is current, but I feel it leaves me little time to critique myself. The good thing about doing it this way is I find I don’t go back and edit myself over and over. If I were to truly let my brain loose with that task I might never hit publish on a single one. I have learned that one has to experience criticism to grow and without the failures there could be no successes!
So, with that being said I think we have resigned ourselves to take more risks, embrace the possibility of failure but more importantly to enjoy the now . And whenever we decide we want to do something different it is hard to find someone who can give us a valid “why not“! With that mentality we will see where we go from here. Between now and next Thursday I will have had my 3 month follow up mammogram. I am nervous of course but trust it will be fine whatever happens. Today I am “Enjoying my NOW!”
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Our First Project
For ALL the things I do that I love dearly, not one has brought me as much joy as watching my 7 yo walk proudly with his social studies project to the truck and my 5 yo running back to me for 2nd hugs and after while alligators!
Quote of the Day
"Happiness, is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that, but simply growth" William Butler Yeats
Fall is in the Air!
As I type this morning the sun is coming in so warm through the window. It makes it feel out here on the porch like autumn is somewhere in the air. This summer has been a transformative summer for sure. With one child beginning 2nd grade and the other kindergarten it is obvious I have had little ones for a while. Coming to terms with the fact we have no babies anymore has been rougher than I thought. But, we must look at the bigger picture.
As Bayne is getting ready to hit the road heavier and heavier we have been talking about how we did this before, 2 years ago still in Montgomery. We talked about how we have always worked together. After getting off the daycare/corporate cubby roller coaster I took one year off to be with Owen. After a year in school again, I began Lulagrace in 2006. The two of us since then have scheduled our lives around being with our boys constantly. Rarely do we have a sitter, but we make it work!
After spending nearly a month trying to determine if at 36 I was going to be diagnosed with breast cancer or not…I processed emotions I had not ever thought I would be able to process. Was I okay with where I was on my walk, was I happy with the time I was spending with my kids, did I feel pulls to change who I was with this new independence all week starting Aug. 9th? I know this sounds dramatic and all, but when the wire Dr. puts his hand on your shoulder on his way out and says "I prayed for you this morning Melissa that this was not cancer" as you head into surgery…it hits heavy!
I think one of the most humble things you can do is take an honest look at yourself. But mostly importantly you must think of others. I am trying to wean myself off of another roller coaster I have created. I feel my own season changing. Realizations of what I enjoyed as a kid and in my adolescence have surfaced lately, I'd like to paint again. All of you know I have been out of the therapy scene for a bit and in need of some horse therapy myself. They keep us pure of spirit! I'm excited to attend my first NARHA conference in just a few weeks. And we certainly enjoy teaching Financial Peace University, but it IS 13 weeks, 26 if we teach it 2x a year!
But I have always been preoccupied with clients, 24/7. Thankful and blessed to have clients! But it takes time from my children, my family, and my household. It has become full time again, quicker than I thought and now with the fast paced world of social media it must be always on. I was thinking how all of my clients through the years have been such a humbling wave in my life. To see folk's experience and process tragedies in their lifetime to toss or keep is exhausting. It takes great focus to steer one back on task after they admit a heartbreaking event. Like Kathie Lee sings…"everyone has a story" Plus I cry too! I get to celebrate their victories with them as well during our time together. Breakthroughs are great no matter how hard it is. In 4 years I've put in some hard days though and am simply worn down and in need of rest.
So, I am going to have to begin looking at my time management systems again. I've hit a hiccup, how to schedule a 40 hour week for myself. With what I normally get done with 15 plus evenings and weekends the possibilities are really endless! I'd have the opportunity to mold and shape it how I wanted 7:30-2:30pm! It's almost too flexible. Throw in a husband who is gone two nights a week allowing time to read quietly and keep house for a few hours? I have to say I have enjoyed not having my laptop in bed with me this week…but I will never give up the TV.
Then there is a little small issue about my own stress and health…I'm on the mend but know that stress equals bad things and I can't have any of it! Tired of swallowing antibiotics, must they be so big? It's like my body is the coast of Africa just hurling things at me like hurricanes to the surface like, see????
I haved lived an odd little life these past few years and met some very interesting people along the way, but feeling my age and my senses and I know change is in the air! As we get ready to prepare our own back to school routine here at the Searcy household...Mom's gonna think about it and get back to you!
posted on: 7/22/2010 2:00:00 PM by Melissa Searcy for http://www.onlineorganizing.com/
As Bayne is getting ready to hit the road heavier and heavier we have been talking about how we did this before, 2 years ago still in Montgomery. We talked about how we have always worked together. After getting off the daycare/corporate cubby roller coaster I took one year off to be with Owen. After a year in school again, I began Lulagrace in 2006. The two of us since then have scheduled our lives around being with our boys constantly. Rarely do we have a sitter, but we make it work!
After spending nearly a month trying to determine if at 36 I was going to be diagnosed with breast cancer or not…I processed emotions I had not ever thought I would be able to process. Was I okay with where I was on my walk, was I happy with the time I was spending with my kids, did I feel pulls to change who I was with this new independence all week starting Aug. 9th? I know this sounds dramatic and all, but when the wire Dr. puts his hand on your shoulder on his way out and says "I prayed for you this morning Melissa that this was not cancer" as you head into surgery…it hits heavy!
I think one of the most humble things you can do is take an honest look at yourself. But mostly importantly you must think of others. I am trying to wean myself off of another roller coaster I have created. I feel my own season changing. Realizations of what I enjoyed as a kid and in my adolescence have surfaced lately, I'd like to paint again. All of you know I have been out of the therapy scene for a bit and in need of some horse therapy myself. They keep us pure of spirit! I'm excited to attend my first NARHA conference in just a few weeks. And we certainly enjoy teaching Financial Peace University, but it IS 13 weeks, 26 if we teach it 2x a year!
But I have always been preoccupied with clients, 24/7. Thankful and blessed to have clients! But it takes time from my children, my family, and my household. It has become full time again, quicker than I thought and now with the fast paced world of social media it must be always on. I was thinking how all of my clients through the years have been such a humbling wave in my life. To see folk's experience and process tragedies in their lifetime to toss or keep is exhausting. It takes great focus to steer one back on task after they admit a heartbreaking event. Like Kathie Lee sings…"everyone has a story" Plus I cry too! I get to celebrate their victories with them as well during our time together. Breakthroughs are great no matter how hard it is. In 4 years I've put in some hard days though and am simply worn down and in need of rest.
So, I am going to have to begin looking at my time management systems again. I've hit a hiccup, how to schedule a 40 hour week for myself. With what I normally get done with 15 plus evenings and weekends the possibilities are really endless! I'd have the opportunity to mold and shape it how I wanted 7:30-2:30pm! It's almost too flexible. Throw in a husband who is gone two nights a week allowing time to read quietly and keep house for a few hours? I have to say I have enjoyed not having my laptop in bed with me this week…but I will never give up the TV.
Then there is a little small issue about my own stress and health…I'm on the mend but know that stress equals bad things and I can't have any of it! Tired of swallowing antibiotics, must they be so big? It's like my body is the coast of Africa just hurling things at me like hurricanes to the surface like, see????
I haved lived an odd little life these past few years and met some very interesting people along the way, but feeling my age and my senses and I know change is in the air! As we get ready to prepare our own back to school routine here at the Searcy household...Mom's gonna think about it and get back to you!
posted on: 7/22/2010 2:00:00 PM by Melissa Searcy for http://www.onlineorganizing.com/
UNPLUG!
This past week my husband started going out on the road more. Hotel business centers are less than tolerable, so I agreed to let him take my laptop. Now, this is a major thing for me! For the better part of one year I know I have been on one so many times during my day it is sad to look at it closely. Maybe 14 hours? Not ALL at once, but added up throughout the day, yes likely.
With two evenings to read, catch up with my boys, go through magazines in the house…I realized I had more time to be present and less distracted. I slept better and went to bed easier than normal.
After a few recent stressful months I recently began experiencing anxiety attacks again. Sometimes, life just gets to be too much. I know everyone has suffering and everyone has needs, we all do at the same time. It is those experiences and how we let emotion run wild that allow us to act the way we do. Some of us have hissy fits, some have complete breakdowns and shout, but some of us keep it bottled in…rationalizing each move like a chess piece. Careful not to offend or scar. That is me! With having to have a very faithful obedience these past few weeks I just got really worn down. And panic attacks come from that! 3 in one day.
So, I have to unplug…..quickly! I started (as my information addiction will demonstrate) researching unplugging and prioritizing technology and blogs like www.43folders.com. I found multiple living on less strategies like www.sixitemsorless.com where participants live on 6 basic items of clothing or 41pounds.org where you can get off the junk mail lists and take back your mailbox.
Something I learned from all of those sites and people is we ALL suffer from too much information! Too much stuff and not enough time. I've watched my kids during these last few weeks of summer get their faces closer and closer to those DS screens becoming less engaged with us when we talk to them. Why? Because they see mom and dad do it with the computers! We have 6 TV's and more than 2 are on at any given time. We text constantly! But we don't keep batteries in our home phone and it is used as a fax line only.
I can hear a song on a television show, search that episode online and find the title and artist along with a You tube video within seconds. I can then share it to all my friends. I can watch Real Housewives and follow what the actual housewives are saying on Twitter and participate in complete real time.
Really???
Where's my LIFE?! Oh, I have devalued it in all this 24/7 real time tweets and updates and emails, blogs and texts and ichats and Skypes…..BOOM! You know why so many people are in my inbox? Because I'M in my inbox!!
posted 7/29/10 on http://www.onlineorganizing.com/
With two evenings to read, catch up with my boys, go through magazines in the house…I realized I had more time to be present and less distracted. I slept better and went to bed easier than normal.
After a few recent stressful months I recently began experiencing anxiety attacks again. Sometimes, life just gets to be too much. I know everyone has suffering and everyone has needs, we all do at the same time. It is those experiences and how we let emotion run wild that allow us to act the way we do. Some of us have hissy fits, some have complete breakdowns and shout, but some of us keep it bottled in…rationalizing each move like a chess piece. Careful not to offend or scar. That is me! With having to have a very faithful obedience these past few weeks I just got really worn down. And panic attacks come from that! 3 in one day.
So, I have to unplug…..quickly! I started (as my information addiction will demonstrate) researching unplugging and prioritizing technology and blogs like www.43folders.com. I found multiple living on less strategies like www.sixitemsorless.com where participants live on 6 basic items of clothing or 41pounds.org where you can get off the junk mail lists and take back your mailbox.
Something I learned from all of those sites and people is we ALL suffer from too much information! Too much stuff and not enough time. I've watched my kids during these last few weeks of summer get their faces closer and closer to those DS screens becoming less engaged with us when we talk to them. Why? Because they see mom and dad do it with the computers! We have 6 TV's and more than 2 are on at any given time. We text constantly! But we don't keep batteries in our home phone and it is used as a fax line only.
I can hear a song on a television show, search that episode online and find the title and artist along with a You tube video within seconds. I can then share it to all my friends. I can watch Real Housewives and follow what the actual housewives are saying on Twitter and participate in complete real time.
Really???
Where's my LIFE?! Oh, I have devalued it in all this 24/7 real time tweets and updates and emails, blogs and texts and ichats and Skypes…..BOOM! You know why so many people are in my inbox? Because I'M in my inbox!!
posted 7/29/10 on http://www.onlineorganizing.com/
What do you do with your free time? Could you Coast?
What do you do with your free time? Could you Coast?
So, I assume from the title some of you are ROFL saying "Melissa, WHAT free time?" Yea, yea, me too a few years ago, but I sat down for the first time this week since having my boys 7 yrs ago and realized I in deed have free time, furthermore, I've always had free time! But, did I make the most of it?
After taking baby steps all these years with a long term goal and a husband in agreement we seemed to have reached it. We had a 5 yr plan after Owen was born, I would stay at home with him until he started Kindergarten and then I would grow my own business or go back to work. I had no idea WHAT I was going to do but I gave it to God. All I knew was that after 7 years in the newspaper industry I was NOT going to go back to work as a full time career mom! It is quite funny when I look back over the years we stayed pretty steady. I spent all that time distracted, focusing on this business realizing I made it work but did I get the most out of my time of being a stay at home mom. I ended up working more and longer hours but I was home when they were home, right? That is how I always looked at it. But
I never took time for myself, I rarely committed to a new hobby, I didn't really do any cooking Bayne did most of it, and most nights I fell asleep before the 10 o'clock news was on leaving NO time for my poor supportive husband.
The relationship I now have with the Father is growing by leaps and bounds. We committed our lives to Jesus Christ the year our second son was born. Our lives have changed so dramatically since then but one thing is obvious. It had a course and we stayed true to it. We are in a unique position to allow me to continue to stay at home. I could cook, work at the therapy farm with the kids and the horses, I could volunteer more with women's groups and church activities. There are lots of things I could do. I would certainly like to lighten my Lula load and write more. I would like to cut it to a project every 4-6 weeks. Space them out more. If I control my anxiety and try not to let the OCD takeover (close to counting 1-2-3 as I turn off the coffee pot, that's bad!) I could have a remarkable life. I could be there for my children, there for my husband, there for my church, there for my friends, there for my passions, there for my clients, there for my children's teachers, there for "me"time! Could it really work this perfectly? I started drawing and painting again a few weeks ago and even bought a new sketchbook which is something I did daily 20 years ago. I felt good about it!
Having been at that farm this past week really heals me too. I cannot wait for the first ride of the new fall season. I truly enjoy what I do with my time. It warms my heart to know that when my kids are sick I can clear my day and change it at a moment's notice. But I don't like having unstructured time. Tuesday, I was home and got bored very quickly.
While the last few years I have worked extremely hard and witnessed some very humbling moments with complete strangers, I've taken inventory on my own life and processes to be the most efficient I can be, I realize it all worked into a nice little package that brings me where I am today.
The other day my mother, in her mid 70's, suggested I seek out a career with the state, or maybe the post office. So well meaning I love my mother, but it was a little bit crushing at the same time. While I would certainly go back to punching a time card if we needed the income…I just cannot justify it. So for now I am completely okay with coasting. Making my way much like we decided to do in 2005...let God have it and see what He wants me to do. Focusing on my family and my health and pursuing that which I only feel passionately about. The rest will work itself out in my free time!
posted on: 8/19/2010 2:00:00 PM by Melissa Searcy
So, I assume from the title some of you are ROFL saying "Melissa, WHAT free time?" Yea, yea, me too a few years ago, but I sat down for the first time this week since having my boys 7 yrs ago and realized I in deed have free time, furthermore, I've always had free time! But, did I make the most of it?
After taking baby steps all these years with a long term goal and a husband in agreement we seemed to have reached it. We had a 5 yr plan after Owen was born, I would stay at home with him until he started Kindergarten and then I would grow my own business or go back to work. I had no idea WHAT I was going to do but I gave it to God. All I knew was that after 7 years in the newspaper industry I was NOT going to go back to work as a full time career mom! It is quite funny when I look back over the years we stayed pretty steady. I spent all that time distracted, focusing on this business realizing I made it work but did I get the most out of my time of being a stay at home mom. I ended up working more and longer hours but I was home when they were home, right? That is how I always looked at it. But
I never took time for myself, I rarely committed to a new hobby, I didn't really do any cooking Bayne did most of it, and most nights I fell asleep before the 10 o'clock news was on leaving NO time for my poor supportive husband.
The relationship I now have with the Father is growing by leaps and bounds. We committed our lives to Jesus Christ the year our second son was born. Our lives have changed so dramatically since then but one thing is obvious. It had a course and we stayed true to it. We are in a unique position to allow me to continue to stay at home. I could cook, work at the therapy farm with the kids and the horses, I could volunteer more with women's groups and church activities. There are lots of things I could do. I would certainly like to lighten my Lula load and write more. I would like to cut it to a project every 4-6 weeks. Space them out more. If I control my anxiety and try not to let the OCD takeover (close to counting 1-2-3 as I turn off the coffee pot, that's bad!) I could have a remarkable life. I could be there for my children, there for my husband, there for my church, there for my friends, there for my passions, there for my clients, there for my children's teachers, there for "me"time! Could it really work this perfectly? I started drawing and painting again a few weeks ago and even bought a new sketchbook which is something I did daily 20 years ago. I felt good about it!
Having been at that farm this past week really heals me too. I cannot wait for the first ride of the new fall season. I truly enjoy what I do with my time. It warms my heart to know that when my kids are sick I can clear my day and change it at a moment's notice. But I don't like having unstructured time. Tuesday, I was home and got bored very quickly.
While the last few years I have worked extremely hard and witnessed some very humbling moments with complete strangers, I've taken inventory on my own life and processes to be the most efficient I can be, I realize it all worked into a nice little package that brings me where I am today.
The other day my mother, in her mid 70's, suggested I seek out a career with the state, or maybe the post office. So well meaning I love my mother, but it was a little bit crushing at the same time. While I would certainly go back to punching a time card if we needed the income…I just cannot justify it. So for now I am completely okay with coasting. Making my way much like we decided to do in 2005...let God have it and see what He wants me to do. Focusing on my family and my health and pursuing that which I only feel passionately about. The rest will work itself out in my free time!
posted on: 8/19/2010 2:00:00 PM by Melissa Searcy
Monday, September 6, 2010
Just a Housewife?
Recently my youngest started Kindergarten and I was a little lost for a week or two. Bayne and I made a plan 5 yrs ago and we had arrived at the doorstep of our goal's front door. We made it! In 2005 I made a decision to walk away from a high stress job for a demanding corporation. I existed for as long as I could in that environment until I could take no more of it. The abuse that goes on sometimes in cubbie hell is astonishing. I remember being in the ladies room one morning pregnant with my first son, Baylor, whom I suffered morning sickness the whole time. I had a manager come in and tell me to get back out on the floor making calls. I never let that resentment go, it literally felt like she punched me in the stomach. But the reason I worked were always for the people I worked with. I enjoyed the sense of community. I just saw a window, it was open…so I took it! I wanted to be home with my kids and I wanted a year off from trying to figure out what I was going to be.
Fast forward 5 years I've raised my toddlers, become an entrepreneur, dedicated my life to Christ, become an Interior Decorator and a Professional Home Organizer, spoken at numerous functions, made it to TV a couple of times, got to do a lot for charity and met some interesting people who've molded me as a whole person.
Throw in those little revelations I had over the summer, the threat of breast cancer is not nearly as scary as loose cannons so all in all it was an informative season. While truly feeling the temptation to quit it all, to walk away even removing the Lula signs from the truck I just kept thinking to myself…What would Lula do?
Would she quit and let defeat leave its mark, would I GO BACK to work? So I got kicked in the gut a couple of times…I'm no different than 10 other housewives I know going through the very same transformations. We are thirty-something housewives, college degreed, and feeling frowned upon for electing to be housewives. We feel we must prove to everyone that we are not lazy, soap opera watching bon- bon eaters!
It felt good to be home with Owen when he was a baby. Totally different than Baylor, who because of mom and dad's jobs had to be full timed daycared and became familiar with institutionalized child care at 6 weeks of age. He was a Babywise Baby, thus today he is very organized and a little obsessive about where items belong. Great student, excellent handwriting and eager to learn. However, has a bit of a temper and incredibly stubborn. Could it be because Mom and Dad were stressed over work ALL the time? Owen was allowed free rein, we did what we wanted when we wanted. Baylor came home shortly after I did and we were all together until 4K. Owen has his fits too but it an incredibly laid back child. So much his teacher has written several times he needs to speed up a little. We joke that Owen is on his own time clock. But now they are at school 5 days a week. This having NOONE all day long has been a bit of a bother for me. Not sure how to structure myself.
It has had me thinking…what did Betty Jean do all day? My sister recently commented on Facebook to me that she thought our Mother was possibly a secret spy, driving in the garage in her Maverick just in the nick of time to make it look like she'd been home all day. We never had to clean though, I don't remember EVER having to help with chores. She spoiled us!
But she was the quintessential housewife! So was grandmother Lula, and most of the women in my family. I get lectures constantly from my Mother about how much I do, but I never want to be accused of being lazy. I work hard and I'm proud of what I can do. So, why can't I be satisfied just being a housewife? And apparently I'm not the only one, because researching for this blog I found tons of women asking the same thing!! I do know that everything I have experienced in my history has led me to this point, I am to do something great with this…but alas, there's that fork again we talked about a few weeks ago. But just being afraid to call myself a housewife has at times almost gotten the best of me.
The one thing I do know, is that my kids need me now more than ever. With homework, tests, social studies projects and new routines they need my consistency and they definitely need a prepared mother. What I really enjoy is seeing ideas come to fruition. I enjoy encouraging others, I especially enjoy encouraging other women who are just getting their windows open.
I went with the girls to watch Eat, Pray, Love a few weeks ago and had one moment of losing it…when the elephant greets her in the garden. Ahhh! God speaks!! I get it because I am allowed to go out to a barn 3 times a week and witness God's creation in all it's morning glory. It got me to thinking about my own Eat Pray Love as Oprah had Julia lists during her interview. My Eat was Lula, My Pray was EASI and My love was my darling boys and husband. Yes, I'm a lucky housewife.
Fast forward 5 years I've raised my toddlers, become an entrepreneur, dedicated my life to Christ, become an Interior Decorator and a Professional Home Organizer, spoken at numerous functions, made it to TV a couple of times, got to do a lot for charity and met some interesting people who've molded me as a whole person.
Throw in those little revelations I had over the summer, the threat of breast cancer is not nearly as scary as loose cannons so all in all it was an informative season. While truly feeling the temptation to quit it all, to walk away even removing the Lula signs from the truck I just kept thinking to myself…What would Lula do?
Would she quit and let defeat leave its mark, would I GO BACK to work? So I got kicked in the gut a couple of times…I'm no different than 10 other housewives I know going through the very same transformations. We are thirty-something housewives, college degreed, and feeling frowned upon for electing to be housewives. We feel we must prove to everyone that we are not lazy, soap opera watching bon- bon eaters!
It felt good to be home with Owen when he was a baby. Totally different than Baylor, who because of mom and dad's jobs had to be full timed daycared and became familiar with institutionalized child care at 6 weeks of age. He was a Babywise Baby, thus today he is very organized and a little obsessive about where items belong. Great student, excellent handwriting and eager to learn. However, has a bit of a temper and incredibly stubborn. Could it be because Mom and Dad were stressed over work ALL the time? Owen was allowed free rein, we did what we wanted when we wanted. Baylor came home shortly after I did and we were all together until 4K. Owen has his fits too but it an incredibly laid back child. So much his teacher has written several times he needs to speed up a little. We joke that Owen is on his own time clock. But now they are at school 5 days a week. This having NOONE all day long has been a bit of a bother for me. Not sure how to structure myself.
It has had me thinking…what did Betty Jean do all day? My sister recently commented on Facebook to me that she thought our Mother was possibly a secret spy, driving in the garage in her Maverick just in the nick of time to make it look like she'd been home all day. We never had to clean though, I don't remember EVER having to help with chores. She spoiled us!
But she was the quintessential housewife! So was grandmother Lula, and most of the women in my family. I get lectures constantly from my Mother about how much I do, but I never want to be accused of being lazy. I work hard and I'm proud of what I can do. So, why can't I be satisfied just being a housewife? And apparently I'm not the only one, because researching for this blog I found tons of women asking the same thing!! I do know that everything I have experienced in my history has led me to this point, I am to do something great with this…but alas, there's that fork again we talked about a few weeks ago. But just being afraid to call myself a housewife has at times almost gotten the best of me.
The one thing I do know, is that my kids need me now more than ever. With homework, tests, social studies projects and new routines they need my consistency and they definitely need a prepared mother. What I really enjoy is seeing ideas come to fruition. I enjoy encouraging others, I especially enjoy encouraging other women who are just getting their windows open.
I went with the girls to watch Eat, Pray, Love a few weeks ago and had one moment of losing it…when the elephant greets her in the garden. Ahhh! God speaks!! I get it because I am allowed to go out to a barn 3 times a week and witness God's creation in all it's morning glory. It got me to thinking about my own Eat Pray Love as Oprah had Julia lists during her interview. My Eat was Lula, My Pray was EASI and My love was my darling boys and husband. Yes, I'm a lucky housewife.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)